1. captors0llux:

    growing up is watching your younger sibling get taller and taller until they finally surpass you until you’re left a diminished pride and  memories of when you were the supreme sibling

    (Source: peterthestarcatcher, via beautyisinthesimplicity)

     
  2. awwww-cute:

    I tried to shame him for eating all my shoes. I’m not sure what I expected

    (via proud-member-of-hermits-united)

     

  3. tom-spanks:

    remember when u were like 11 and the only thing u wanted was a lava lamp

    (via proud-member-of-hermits-united)

     

  4. extralargecondom:

    Using your bra as a wallet because you don’t have any fucking pockets #justgirlythings

    (via proud-member-of-hermits-united)

     
  5.  

  6. slavcutieghoul:

    deanisanactualprincess:

    kevinssecretplace4546:

    justanotherklainer:

    baptisms:

    do puppets realize they’re always being anally fisted

     i though it said puppies and was concerned

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    JEFF DUNHAM EVERYBODY

    (via beautyisinthesimplicity)

     

  7. macintush:

    "It’s pronounced like jif"

    Yeah well I don’t gif a fuck

    (via alexernst)

     

  8. suspend:

    its never safe to use tumblr beside your parents

    (via manda)

     

  9. oknope:

    can we skip this whole “college” thing and go straight and go to the part where i have a really awesome job and spend all my time traveling?

    (via cassbuttstiel)

     
  10. bitchiel:

    justaddtommy:

    i think we’re out of ink

    have you tried turning it on and off again

    (Source: bratbrain, via cassbuttstiel)

     

  11. macklemack:

    50 shades of dark circles under my eyes

    (Source: ratche-t, via alexernst)

     

  12. fartgallery:

    chesterloaf:

    fartgallery:

    i donate blood in the hopes that my blood will overpower theirs and take control of their body so i will gain another vessel to use as my own

    why am I reblogging this?

    it appears my blood has been successful

    (via refridgerator)

     
  13. (Source: romvnov, via alexernst)

     

  14. phobias:

    do you ever just wanna sleep for like 3 years 

    (via naotarou)

     

  15. irrreversibility:

    boys cry
    girls masturbate
    boys can like pink and not be gay
    girls can have short hair and not be a lesbian
    boys can like ballet
    girls can like video games
    boys can be hot without a six pack
    girls can be hot without a hairless body
    boys can have hair down to their waists
    girls can have stretch marks, curves and back fat

    gender doesn’t determine what you can and cannot enjoy, what you can and cannot look like or what you can and cannot do

    (via theonlybrunetteweasley)